Hi prince,
Sorry I haven't written...I've been a little busy last week but trust me, I didn't forget about you. You know I always talk to you in my head anyways. So, I was on the ole facebook, and another friend had a baby. It was o hard seeing his picture, but I forced myself too. I need to learn to deal with the fact that there will always be pregnant women and babies being born. I have to learn to be happy for them, because you would want me too. It was just so hard, because they would go back and forth complaining about when the baby would come and having to go back and forth to the hospital...I just wanted to say "Be happy those are the only problems you are having." I don't though because I don't want to be debbie downer. I just wish people would appreciate the life that have inside of them more, but alas it took me losing you to have that appreciation. Yay me.
So if you can, will you how your daddy some love today? He's been going through a lot at work, and I feel so bad about how stressed he has been. He really needs something good to happen. He works so hard little man, and he deserves happiness. I wish you where here to make him smile. He loves us so much.
I really miss you a lot little guy. I woke up this morning filled with sadness, and I knew it was going to be a really hard day. I met a new friend who lost his little girl and I hope you guys are friends. I wish none of us had to go through this but it's like they say "There is no compassion without pain." I never understood that till you died.
Saturday I thought about you a lot...your daddy and I went and got our boat from the marina. He was soooo happy. I'll have to post some picture for you. We got bagels and ate out in the middle of the bay. It would have been your first time out there...I wonder if you would have like it. Reminded me of the day you died, and the only trip you would ever get to take. I kinda laughed thinking about your name which is surrounded by the symbol of fire, but when I think of being on the water I think of you most. You sailed the same waters with us. You got to be in the ocean once. That was the best day of my life...followed by the worst. I know you where with us though...I know you always are. Thank you for all the little reminders each day.
The Mach of Dimes walk is only two weeks away little man! We have raised quite a bit of money in your honor! My old job in Atlanta is doing a big fundraiser in your name this friday! I hope you are there to see all the wonderful people you have touched. People who have never met me are spreading the word of your life, and so are friends and your family. I am blessed with so much love on this earth. You my darling have changed lives. You have taught love and compassion...you accomplished in forty five minutes of living more than I ever have. I love you so much baby boy. The tears still fall with the ache I have for you, andI am trying to stay positive, but some days it is so hard. I just try to be strong and brave for you. You deserve a momma who loves you more than anything. I hope you feel that love up where you are. I wish I could shower the world with it. Well my darling, I am going to go now, but just know I am always here for you. I hope I can see you in my dreams.
Always yours,
Momma
Sorry I haven't written...I've been a little busy last week but trust me, I didn't forget about you. You know I always talk to you in my head anyways. So, I was on the ole facebook, and another friend had a baby. It was o hard seeing his picture, but I forced myself too. I need to learn to deal with the fact that there will always be pregnant women and babies being born. I have to learn to be happy for them, because you would want me too. It was just so hard, because they would go back and forth complaining about when the baby would come and having to go back and forth to the hospital...I just wanted to say "Be happy those are the only problems you are having." I don't though because I don't want to be debbie downer. I just wish people would appreciate the life that have inside of them more, but alas it took me losing you to have that appreciation. Yay me.
So if you can, will you how your daddy some love today? He's been going through a lot at work, and I feel so bad about how stressed he has been. He really needs something good to happen. He works so hard little man, and he deserves happiness. I wish you where here to make him smile. He loves us so much.
I really miss you a lot little guy. I woke up this morning filled with sadness, and I knew it was going to be a really hard day. I met a new friend who lost his little girl and I hope you guys are friends. I wish none of us had to go through this but it's like they say "There is no compassion without pain." I never understood that till you died.
Saturday I thought about you a lot...your daddy and I went and got our boat from the marina. He was soooo happy. I'll have to post some picture for you. We got bagels and ate out in the middle of the bay. It would have been your first time out there...I wonder if you would have like it. Reminded me of the day you died, and the only trip you would ever get to take. I kinda laughed thinking about your name which is surrounded by the symbol of fire, but when I think of being on the water I think of you most. You sailed the same waters with us. You got to be in the ocean once. That was the best day of my life...followed by the worst. I know you where with us though...I know you always are. Thank you for all the little reminders each day.
The Mach of Dimes walk is only two weeks away little man! We have raised quite a bit of money in your honor! My old job in Atlanta is doing a big fundraiser in your name this friday! I hope you are there to see all the wonderful people you have touched. People who have never met me are spreading the word of your life, and so are friends and your family. I am blessed with so much love on this earth. You my darling have changed lives. You have taught love and compassion...you accomplished in forty five minutes of living more than I ever have. I love you so much baby boy. The tears still fall with the ache I have for you, andI am trying to stay positive, but some days it is so hard. I just try to be strong and brave for you. You deserve a momma who loves you more than anything. I hope you feel that love up where you are. I wish I could shower the world with it. Well my darling, I am going to go now, but just know I am always here for you. I hope I can see you in my dreams.
Always yours,
Momma
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